Act II

F. Scott Fitzgerald (or possibly it was Scott Williams) once said that there are no second acts in American life. It’s quite possible he was talking about the ashes of his own once-glorious career, which collapsed when he left the warm comfort of South France (Jordan’s Bulls) to pursue fame and fortune in suburban Baltimore (the Sixers) with a mentally unbalanced wife (Derrick Coleman), ultimately dying at the age of 40 from alcoholism (getting traded to the Bucks). Now, I don’t like to disparage the sage wisdom of one of our greatest writers (and the man who backed up Shawn Bradley), but I would like to point out that we are in the process of witnessing a rare exception to his famous dictum.

I’m talking about the rejuvenation of Samuel Davis Dalembert.

For some, the season-ending surgery to Elton Brand is tragedy writ large; an excuse to wallow in another season of self-pity and a welcome retreat to the familiar cocoon of lottery-watching. But I know I speak for the entire Dalembert Report, and for Samuel Dalembert himself, when I say: count us out!

A week ago, the Dalembert we knew and loved was scarcely recognizable. A half-season of fractured minutes, disparate coaching ideologies, and abortive attempts to integrate his frontcourt partner had rendered Sammy confused and tentative. His playing time was reduced and his style was cramped as Coaches Cheeks and DiLeo sought to find a place for Brand, the Sixers free agent prize. There was even hushed talk amongst some Dalembert cognoscenti that Sammy’s time in Philly could be nearing its end. But with last nights news that Brand would be lost for the season, Sammy was finally free.

Unshackled from his Brandian bonds, the Haitian One unleashed his exuberant brand of basketball mayhem on the unsuspecting Pacers. 18 points and 20 boards later, and the old Sammy D is back, which can only mean great things for the Sixers, and for society at large.

Brand’s injury means the remainder of this campaign will see the Sixies revert to their natural madcap style, getting steals, running the floor, missing free throws and generally treating the court as their own personal Jackson Pollack painting. It means more ‘Reese, more ‘Reg, and more Sammy D. It may mean the playoffs, and more; even Brandless, I still believe we are the 5th best team in the East. Elton Brand can go back to doing what he does best: producing Werner Herzog movies. Maybe next year he will return a changed and healed man, ready to take us to the Promised Land. But for now, let us treat his injury as the benediction it surely is.