Tuesday, October 27, 2009

What is the World Coming To?

First the Mets blow the division leads two years in a row to the Phillies. Then Mike Piazza gets caught canoodling with Lance Bass at a gay bar in Chelsea (pretty sure that happened, even if the internet cannot confirm). Next the Mets finish closer in the standings to the Nationals than they do to the Phillies in 2009. And while all of the above demonstrates the Mets swift and steady decline into being a joke of an organization, the ABOVE represents the lowest moment in recent memory.

See Steve Phillips did what any man with a full head of perfect silver hair, an appetite for hyperbole, and an impressive baseball resume would do. First, he got a job with ESPN following his run with the Metropolitans. Then he started spending extra time at the workplace, you know, brushing up on his catch phrases, his posture, and his bottom-lipping. Soon enough he wasn't making it home for dinner, failing to keep track of his children's after-school obligations, and spending an inordinate amount of time mentoring the fresh faces filling the EPSN newsroom. No one was shocked to find out that (gasp) a man in his position was having an affair. Not I, not you, not even Endy Chavez. But low and behold, Steve Phillips' conduct is as disappointing as it is predictable.

Not to beat around the bush here, but if I were to, I dunno, risk my job, family, otherwise decent reputation in the public...I would not cheat on my wife with the above. In fact, I wouldn't even glance at the above. I might let the above dome me up while vacationing on some third-world island and tell her my name was Ed Wade, but I most certainly would not conduct an extramarital relationship with her. See Steve, you have a duty to the male population. If we are going to learn of your deplorable behavior, you have to, at the very least, leave the men of the world sympathetic to your plight. Leave us nodding in agreement, muttering to ourselves that we too would leave our significant others for a taste of that apple bottom. Or for pure entertainment, show us that you are a freak like Marv. But to throw it all a way on a girl who may or may not have graduated from the GFS class of 1998, indulged a bit too much on free donut Friday, and stalked your son on facebook? Really? The entire Mets fan base should be disgusted with themselves.