Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Department of Mustaches

Would you buy a burrito from this man:

I probably wouldn't either. You know who would though? Geoff Geary. That rat-faced monkey is the kind of guy that would probably buy a burrito from anybody. You know what else he would do? Give up a bunch of hits in a close game so that the Phillies lose and Timmy Dych has to restarin himself the next morning from strangling some innocent dusthead ex con with his rally towel.

Published reports (and by published, I mean reports that were sent to me via text message by extremely drunk and otherwise unreliable sources) indicate that Geary has been seen hitting the town with Pat the Deviant. Which might go a long ways towards explaining his suckitude, in addition to his rumored colorectal blockages.